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Sandakan?

Having a great time with boyboy at home.. He is filling up my free time for me.. :) My hometown just makes me lazy day by day.. just eat sleep play hard..

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HOME SWEET HOME!

dudeeeee....... I'm home after such a long flight... hubby boy is being so lovely.... but the sad thing that happened to me was every single person who saw me says im so freakin fat! damn its depressing..i dont really feel like going out anymore after that.. seriously speechless when i saw my teacher this afternoon and he even said that i fatt fuk!! what the hell..... :'(




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Scandalism

Why do I have to see all my friends go through hard times or bad relationships? It's like looking right at a mirror. When I looked at friends surrounding me, they are the sweetest friends I've ever met. And every single one of them are easily being disturbed by emotions. Every single time I watch a sad movie, they cry and cry, but I'm just sitting there asking myself, am I really heartless? A person who makes me cry, must be someone that owns me. hmmm... why?

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Tip toe-ing at your back... and......
hug you tight tight... :)

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Do you know that sometimes when someone asks how have you been lately, you just don't really know if they are just trying to not make the situation awkward or they really do care about you.

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Me want a SWAROVSKI necklace or a bracelet!!! Going for a hunt................ :'(

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shishashishashishashisha... Baby sang me The Science because he wants me to sleep and not emo again.. how sweet.. always love when he sings it.. :) And my baby is flying to kl with me when I head back to Tas after my holiday. heeeeeee.... It's 7 a.m. and I'm still UP! Woooo....-_- Hah...The nights are the scariest moment of my life... Just when I'm about to sleep, thoughts keep coming out of my freakin mind. It's not like I control it in some way, it just pops out on its own.

Aihh...Sometimes I really don't know if I'm making the right decision. Some things aren't that easy to decide. You never know when things would haunt you back at night. I know he loves me very much and I do too. And when he said he is scared of losing me, I feel it too.. But I just don't know if he means forever? or it's just going to be for a short time. He told me he loves me so much and wants to get engage with me now.. I know you are just playing with me.

I wish you were the one who loves me more than I do. I know things have changed and this time I can tell that you are trying very hard just to help me overcome my fear. I feel you loving me everyday..We have been through alot.. Really enough to make us stronger day by day.. But sometimes phobia makes me step one step backwards. The pain I once had, is too scary for me to try it once more. You tell me........ How do I overcome?

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Words can't express my feelings right now!!!

Feel like jumping around now!

Butterflies in my stomach...

15 more days and here I come Sandakan! 

Yay...................

But guess what happened this morning..

My nose stud fell off this morning when I woke up..

It was gone!

And it was so sore this morning goshhh...

the boyfie laughed at me :(

He didn't like me with my nose stud either..

So he's happy i won't be having more than 2 holes on my nose.

HAHA! but everyone who saw me today was like, Audrey!!! You look so not like Audrey today.

Like when I looked at the mirror this morning, I was like looking at myself and said what's missing today?

my girls ask me to pierce it back soon, this time they recommend I use the needle one.

I used the gun one which didn't hurt much. Needle would hurt abit more but its safer because of the curve stud. hehe... gotta ask for the boyfie's permission first. If not kena diao again!

This few days gotta rush rush rush my assignments.

Blehhh disgusting.. xo

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A lot of people don't understand what situation you are facing. They just talk whatever shit they like. Good or bad. They never think about how you feel. I keep everything to myself. If I'm unhappy I go back into my room, slam my door, sort out my room, then start blogging.

Everyone tells me that my temper is sooooo good. I never get angry and I'm so chill about everything. But only my boyfie always say i had such a BAD temper. Sorry k bi? You r the only one I'm comfortable sharing my temper with. heeeee :D

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Heh....... What a sunday morning...... blehhhh... sucks day for today.. tomorrow need hand in english assignment, tuesday for business assignment and wednesday for legal studies assignment!! FML FML!!!! Haven't finish any of them... was cramming last night on assignments..

was planning to finish it till morning.. but 4 something cant stand it anymore and got into bed..

 lol... arghh... Lately I've blogging a lot because my mum told me that law will be tough if I don't like writing.. will try as much to write... Hmmm.... Getting pressure everyday especially dad.. If i don't do good this year, no scholarship for next year.... :( I'm scared....... Daddy will be so disappointed..

 Grrrrr... nyiaks nyiaks..... Lonely.. The boyfriend still sleeping... No one to talk to.... 

Wake up please......... Miss you so much...

I can't stop laughing at myself when I wore this specs... Haha... Retard face... Lol... 

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Dancing with the rhythm... What should we do to fill up an empty cup? :) Just watched "Letters to juliet". It was soooo good! Everyone should watch it.. This movie tells a lot.. In this world, people still get married regardless if the partner was their true love.

Was just wondering about it.. What if you were the one who walked pass the person you loved so much.. At the time that it happened there were obstacles for both of you, but years later, would you still consider about it? Or would you just let go off it.....

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Hmm.... I'm sorry for asking.... I just hope that you understand what we are going through now... Just when I think about our past, too many things happened.. It makes everything more complicated right now. Who doesn't wanna forget things as easily as the wind comes and goes? Who wouldn't have doubts when it comes to feelings? Who can care less about the person they love? Who wouldn't wanna know the truth? Who would wanna invest in something if they don't even know the rules & regulations of the contract? I'm not comparing things.. But the fact is the fact? I know love can't be measured.. That was what I did before, care less about the consequences, in the end, both of us got hurt.... Sometimes it's better to be clever than to just let things be. Everything happens for a reason.. Everything has a start and has its end.. I keep questioning myself... This is not an issue of forgiving and forgetting....... I'm trying to protect myself so we won't get hurt anymore.. What should we do to be more wise and not stronger..

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Why do I need to make decisions? I'm scared to make a wrong one.. Tired of facing problems alone. :'(

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Help me!! Dealing with 5 assignments which are due next week... How stressful can I be now while writing an essay about stress.. lol.... Guess what peeps, me not going back hometown no more, :(... just been talking to my dad about my studies and he highly recommend that I stay back to catch up with my work. How miserable could my life be?



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you making me blur...

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How many millions of hearts are broken daily? Errrhhhmmm.... I really wonder...
And how do they deal with it? heh..........
People who are only in one-night-stand relationships, they never get heartbroken, because they never tried standing still on one.... Desires come and go without us controlling...
Sometimes I wonder myself, is it important to remember how much pain a person cost you?
Jesus was nailed on the cross bearing with all our sin? A holy person, with no reason was brought to suffer my pain? I wonder, is it important anymore.................. Yet here I am, a sinful person, giving myself no reason to forgive and forget... If I could just be more wise, I wouldn't be sorry for myself.. But I've learnt to forgive and forget... Because it isn't an issue anymore to love someone yet try so hard to hurt them....


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Intoxicated, very.

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I don't know why our feelings are always bigger than our brain..

Its true that if you love someone, just stop playing the game....

Stop thinking of what you gonna do next... 

Stop persuading yourself with a thousand words that your brain tells you..

Another beginning of a chapter in my life....

Its 7:48pm now. Getting ready to go out to celebrate Krinesh's birthday. For some reason, I don't feel like it... The feeling of drinking alcohol doesn't give me the excitement anymore...

And alcohol has never been my favourite drink.. I drink only because I wanna get drunk..

Ahhhhhhh............... Should I go out? Errrrhhmmm... 

I feel lonely..... Cause my heart is sad......

All my friends are either in a long term relationship (as in at least 2 yrs and above), distance relationship yet still so loving and madly in love, or they just are madly crazy for hot guys.. 

I wish I could be like that.. I wish my heart doesn't stay in place..

Everyone knows this is not at all a healthy thing to do..  :(

What can I do with a broken heart? Who can heal it? God.... Are you listening now?

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只有失去了最爱的人，才知道什么是永远。
A scent can remind you of a person, a past.




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